Christmas Past and Present

It’s amazing, the juxtaposition of life, and emotions. This day, December 23rd, is always fascinating. Tonight as I revel in my family, and the awesomeness of my son transporting me back to what it all meant, I just can’t believe how my life has turned out. 24 years ago tonight, Christmas took on a different sentiment when my dad came home from the hospital, without my mum. We spent Christmas Day with her at New England Baptist, and 3 weeks later…she was gone. While time has passed, and healed, I still miss you. God, I miss you. I wish I could open the front door on Sunday and see your beautiful face. And hear your amazing laugh. I wish you could sleep over and we could go for lunch on Monday. I wish I could call you, for no other reason than to shoot the shit and see how you’re doing. I wish you could hug Finn. I see and feel so much of you in him…he’s so funny and alive…and I just wanted to say hello, and I love you. A magic that has been missing from Christmas has returned, in this beautiful little soul I call my son. I feel like I love being a mum as much as you did, and that makes me so happy, because you were simply…incredible at it.

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